Carpet Bombing & Sikkim Bumper Lottery

Plot

Device hangs after 1 day, and you have only 12 days to fix the issue. For testing you have 10 devices with you. And the best part is that you don’t have a clue what the issue might be related to.

Solution

STEP 1: Make different random fix for every device, and put it for testing.
STEP 2: Next day repeat STEP 1 with a new fix.

With the above approach it is possible to try out 120 fixes for the issue, Uncle Sam calls it “Carpet Bombing”.

Hope

Provided that there are enough crossed fingers in the team, at least one of the fixes may actually fix the issue, this is also called as “Sikkim Bumper Lottery”

Result

History tells Uncle Sam had a very bad experience with carpet bombing as Osama keeps laughing from the comforts of his bunker.

Thankfully the history did not repeat itself and the 120th fix worked on the 11th hour of the 12th day.

All is well that ends well.

Disclaimer

The above act is very risky and was performed by untrained non-professionals. Please don’t try this @ Home, Office, Afghanistan of wherever.

Moral of the Story

Uncle Sam needs to abandon “Carpet Bombing” and switch to “Sikkim Bumper Lottery – Everyday two lucky draws”.

Paparazzi Blogging

Yeah to ek na ek din to hona hi tha, sabke saath hota hai, mere saath zara jaldi ho gaya.

Yes its the #fail moment for me in blogging. And that too with the very 2nd post of mine. I wrote about Raghu ending up in Channel V but it turned out to be his lesser known bro Raajiv.

khoda pahaad nikala chuhiya ka plegue se peedit bachcha

It was premature on my part, I jumped the gun. A nice lesson for me though :) which I would not like to forget.Thats why I have decided to treat this post of mine just like one of those
"zabaan se nikla wachan" & "bow se fired arrow" yes no ctrl-z buissness here

Now on, no more guess works, no posting without proper research. The last thing I wanna do is gossiping, speculating, spreading rumours, I aint no FakeIPLPlayer, the last thing I wanna be is a Paparazzi Blogger.

Roadies RIP

Let me go back the good old DD days when music was synonymous to Chitrahar. Which ment only 0.5 hours of music a week. Well a few smart fellas saw it as an opportunity.

"If we can provide music for 31 min or more a week, we can actually make it BIG !"

There started the epic war between music channels for the Indian "Eye Balls" and "Ear Drums".

"Ladies and Gentlemen on the blue corner we have Channel V and on the red corner MTV. Let the battle begin".

Both channels were trying to project themselves as the numero-uno music channel in India, there was no clear winner, and to actually win the battle required an out of the box move. This happened for MTV, an "Onida Devil" look alike appeared from darkness, he did not have a fancy name he was called "Raghu". But he made all the difference.

He created the most popular and one of the first reality shows on Indian TV called Roadies. Audiences loved it. More than the actual ride people loved the auditions where the devil made helpless dumb brats to shit in their pants on national TV, he was the cannibal who teared the victim apart into pieces, giving sadistisc pleasure to the viewers. Every one loved to hate him ! Hard core fans evolved who thought they were born to be a Roadie & refused to anything else with thier lives.

MTV was no longer a music channel, it was a channel for the youth. Such was his influence that MTV launched so many mutations of the show (like splitsvilla) that some people started to wonder "where is the music?" But who cares about music when you get enough entertainment otherwise!

Season after season (6 to be exact), Channel V had their backs onto the walls. In the 6th season there were two of them the devil appeared with his twin. There was only one way out for Channel V now.

"By hook or crook, get the devil on this side, lets give them a taste of their own marijuana".

And guess what? I don't know how, but now they finally have dunnit!

And the panic in MTV is quite evident from the fact that they have gathered every one they have for the Roadies season 7 auditions. But no one can replace Raghu and "Nikhil and the two Cyrus" are just a bunch of morons who don't know "whether to act tough or funny"

Roadies handicapped without the godfather is moving towards the path of a slow death. What remains to be seen is how the devil will play his cards, as his new show on Channel V is called "The Player".

10 Qs for Roland Emmerich

Went to watch 2012 the other day, but did a big mistake, contrary to the popular advice, forgot to leave my brain back home. So the unavoidable has happened I want clarifications from Mr Roland Emmerich who has allegedly spent millions to make this shit !

This post contains ***spoilers*** - those who have not watched the movie already . . . ESCAPE !

Dear Roland Emmerich please clarify the following doubts ! will you ?

1. Did you take the concept of disaster film quite literaly ? coz this is actually a disaster ! well done !

2. Why the Indian dude who discovers that "nature is abt to screw us all" is reporting directly to some dude frm US of A ? do you know there is gov in India also ?

3. Why the Indian Scientist has a funny accent when he tries to speak in hindi to his wife ? Have u heard of dubbing ? very useful and not that much expensive, just google it !

4. Actually how many lives does the leads in the movie have ? coz they cheat death so many times that I have lost count. I cannot believe that Yamraaj was on vacation as other ppl were dying - left, right & centre.

5. How many minutes can a human being survive under water ? or did u forget to mention that "Jackson Curtis" & his son were actually mutant amphibians blessed with gills !

6. I would like to congratulate "Gordon Silberman" coz he did an unbelievably wonderful job for an amateur pilot, don't u think so ?

7. Do you know that there are certain laws of physics which every one is bound to obey, even if u live in a parallel universe ?

8. Is this a parody for disaster movies ? going over the top for anything & everything gives such an impression ! if its a parody then its a masterpiece !

9. How can it be that the tickets for the ark were sold for 1 bn euros each, yet the whole thing remained a secret until the very last moment, no one except a bum radio jockey frm outside knew abt it ! aaahhh gimme a break !

10. Why did u decided to make the climax of the movie all abt "closing of a jammed door" ? I thought we were watching the world getting screwed !

Any ways I heard that this will be ur last disaster movie, well that's a Gr8 decision ! Thanx a lot for treating us like a lolly-pop sucking 3yr old.